18 Comments
User's avatar
Regolith's avatar

Like a traveler who has crossed the desert

And still carries golden dust in his eyes.

This was so beautiful.. 🥺

The stranger's avatar

Thank you sis ❤️

That's my favorite part too

Violet Encantada, PhD's avatar

You captured a genuine dream that I think many people have: the desire to 'return,' even if they have never left their home. The desire to 'return' to happier times, former homes, better states of health, is something we all share.

The stranger's avatar

Yes, home is a state of mind, and sometimes it's also a memory of what was and what has become.

Appreciate you relating to this in a parallel way ❤️‍🔥

Asma's avatar

I love the English version but there’s a special taste to the Spanish one. Beautifully written! ✨🤎

The stranger's avatar

As you always say. Translation kills the poem 😵‍💫

But thank you alot I know you can relate to this ❤️

Castor K Pollux's avatar

The idea of return is handled with a lot of steadiness here. It feels earned rather than aspirational. I like how the imagery carries continuity across the piece. The sense of return never breaks.

The stranger's avatar

Thank you Carlos for deeply going through this trip with me and understanding it.

Thoughtful

Thank you 💙💙

Una Rouquine's avatar

The type of words that grasp your heart and makes it bleed with an emotion you can’t describe. The power of poetry💌

The stranger's avatar

Thank you for feeling that ❤️🫶🏾

The power of poetry indeed.

Some say a poet bleeds, the reader enjoys, few relate

Sara da Encarnação's avatar

Not only is a great poem as your Spanish is absolutely great. In fact the Spanish became stronger than the English version quite exquisite. Congratulations 🩵🩵

The stranger's avatar

Thank you 💙

Definitely, the Spanish version is better because it's the original.

As Asma says, Translation kills the poems

Sara da Encarnação's avatar

Translations always do it, that's why I rewrite everything I already had in Portuguese. Ends similar but not the same.

The stranger's avatar

Would def consider that

Dipti  Vyas's avatar

I wish I understood Spanish without taking help from google translate. But I enjoyed the English version.

Wistful without self-pity, grounded without losing wonder—the open door as invitation rather than escape is especially beautiful. And that last image? Carrying desert gold in your eyes is the kind of line that proves some journeys don’t end; they refine.

The stranger's avatar

Def

But at least I wanted to get you guys a glimpse of the imagery

The translation may compromise the poetic sense, but at least the imagery remains intact.

As I mentioned to Regolith, these are my two favorite parts of the poem. I was like, how did I think of that lol

Dipti  Vyas's avatar

Haha! Sometimes the brain just drops a gift and refuses to explain itself.

User's avatar
Comment deleted
Jan 9
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The stranger's avatar

Oh thank you ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥 that coming from you is such a praise

You're so talented